I thought I would give an update on the pacifier because I have been getting asked by a lot of you on how we are doing and how I did it.
Exactly 2 months ago, we started Operation No Pacifier. This was where he was not allowed to have the pacifier to just have the pacifier. No more walking around with it, no more car rides, no more play dates, nothing. Only sleep. The first week was awful and each week after that got better and better. He still gets it when he sleeps, we decided to not fight that battle just yet but he has learned that he can't get out of his bed with it. That's the rule. I think there have been a few days where he stayed in his bed after nap for a good 20 minutes because he wouldn't give it up.
When he wakes in the morning, he has no problem giving it up. It doesn't phase him. It's after nap that is the hardest time for him and I am not quite sure why. Still working that one out.
The main reason I started the Operation No Pacifier was because of his speech. His speech was a tad delayed due to a double ear infection he got at 15 months and we were having a hard time getting him caught back up. So I decided to take the pacifier away to help his tongue movement and to get him speaking to me. I did NOT take it away because he got dirty looks from strange people. I did NOT take it away because I'm mean. I did NOT take it away because society told me that it should have been gone around age 1. I took it away solely based on helping him speak clearer and better.
I wanted to give some tips I did that might work for you if you are in the same boat I was.
1) Don't give in. There was one point (about day 3) that I almost did and someone reached out to me and told me to not. Stick to it. Don't let him win on this one because you are helping him in the long run.
2) Once you have a rule in place, keep at it. I constantly remind him he is ok and doesn't need it. I constantly tell him that he only gets it for bed. That once he's out of his bed, it's put up and he can play with his toys.
3) Put them up. And by up, I mean up up. Don't keep them laying around the house or in the bed. I keep them up high in a container he can not open. He knows they are there even tho he can't see them. I use to put them in reach and that was the worst thing ever. If they are out of sight, they are out of mind.
4) Someone suggested to me to give him a dum-dum in replace for it. It works but the problem with my kid, is that he wants multiple dum-dum's and I'm not about that. Plus, once you start this, it's hard to get out.
5) Don't let anyone else tell you what is right for your kid or what works for you. Only you know. Who cares what society thinks or the fancy mom club. They have their own shit they are dealing with just like you.
6) Find him a replacement for it. Brody's love for Toy Story was my saving grace some days. "Hey Brody, Woody is waiting for you to go play with him." "Hey Brody, I think Buzz is on TV in the living room. Let's go watch!". Finding another comfort item for him worked beautifully.
7) WHEN ALL ELSE FAILS.....THERE'S WINE (for you, not them)
Find what works and stick to it. That's my best advice through all of this. There is a light at the end. There really is. And if you feel like it's just not working, that it is doing more harm then good, wait a few months and try again. It comes easy to some kids and others have a harder time. Finding the balance for you both is what works for Brody and I. He gets the comfort of it when he sleeps and I get to have him talking more clearly and learning how to deal with his emotions.
Now, if I can just bypass this terrible two stage...I would be gold !!!
Love, Me
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