Today I decided I would talk to you instead of my diary. I do my best to talk to you everyday but there are some days I fall extremely behind. I let other things get in my way and forget to speak to you. But my heart is heavy right now and when my heart is heavy, I find speaking to you helps me find peace with things. I know I don't have to say anything you haven't seen or heard but this whole thing with Ferguson is just so awful. So many emotions and so many rash decisions have happened. I am not picking sides here. I don't want to cause an uproar over something that is already causing so much pain but I just need your help, Lord, in understanding how a community can destroy their own little town? How could they set things on fire and say such awful things about one another? There is only one true judge in the world and that is you God. Only you decide what is right or wrong. Now, I am thankful we do have a judicial system in place for protecting those innocent and punishing those guilty. It helps keep order. I understand the law and why we have it. I trust in the law to help protect me. But there are so many people who don't know you or don't understand you who also have a hard time with the law and the understanding of it. The media does not help in this situation going on right now. I feel like they are trying to start another Civil Rights Movement. Where there doesn't need to be one. Even the boy who was killed parents are asking for calmness and no violence. And if anyone has any right to do anything, it's them but they are taking the high road in this. And I am not saying the cop is guilty, he was proven innocent in a court of law and I trust in that. There are facts and evidence that back his story. In Proverbs 3:13-18, you tell me, "Blessed is the one who finds wisdom, and the one who gets understanding, for the gain from her is better than gain from silver and her profit better than gold. She is more precious than jewels, and nothing you desire can compare with her. Long life is in her right hand; in her left hand are riches and honor. Her ways are ways of pleasantness, and all her paths are peace." Finding understanding in this chaos is truly hard but having you on my side, having a place to turn to for answers is so rewarding in itself. I just wish everyone knew you.
Lord, when I see people, I see them for what they are. I don't judge them. I don't make accusations on anyone. I don't care if someone is male or female or white or black or from America or China, you created us all equally. People make their own decisions in life, people pick which path they go. And those people will have to live with those consequences. That is not my place to tell them or to judge them. You created us in your image and your image is perfect. You taught me that through your word. You taught me all about love and kindness and forgiveness. Love and kindness are the easiest for me to understand from you. Having love for one another (to me) comes easy. I have a big heart and it's because of you I know how to use it. And kindness is the easiest for me. I don't get being mean to someone just to get something they want. That's being a bully and I don't stand for that. I find being nice and kind gets me way more in this world and when I show that to the world, I tend to receive it back. Forgiveness to me is the hardest to understand. Finding true forgiveness for someone is incredibly hard, even when that person didn't mean to do it or it was an accident. In Matthew 6:14-15, you tell me, "For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." When I do wrong, I turn to you for forgiveness and as long as it is true in my heart you do. It's the knowing of how someone else feels when they ask for forgiveness is where I struggle. But I trust in you and in the end, if I have done right in your eyes, I will get to meet you one day.
Father, I thank you for everything you have given me. I know everything I have been given is from you; from my family to my friends to my husband to my dogs. I thank you for all the abilities you have given me. I thank you for your time and your wisdom. But mostly Lord, I thank you for your love. Without your love, I am no one. Just a shell walking this world. Just another face in the crowd. Without the love of Jesus Christ, my sins would never be forgiven. I thank you God for it all. The Devil is a sneaky creature, and I thank you for helping me not give in to him. I thank you for the Light in the times of darkness. I love you....
John 1:1-5- "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God. All things were made through him, and without him was not any thing made that was made. In him was life, and the life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it."
In my time of need, I always remember this poem.
It's in your name I pray, Amen!
P.S. Friends, if you are ever in need of a Bible verse or curious as to what the Lord says about something, please visit http://www.openbible.info/topics/